Xptical’s Blog

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted an update.  My medication was really fucking me hard.  I’m going to relax a bit this weekend and let you all know how things are going.

Oh, and I got a Wii!

Last night, Zoloft struck with a vengeance.  He came in fast and slaughtered all.  When he left, he made sure generations will remember him by telling stories of his horrors.  Children will be told for year to come that if they don’t clean their plate, Zoloft will come in with his side effects and take them away.

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So, it’s like 11PM and I can’t sleep.  The Zoloft has completely killed my appetite.  I guess that’s good.  For the first 2 days, I couldn’t stay awake.  Now, I can’t sleep.  Every night, I get these terrible headaches.

Oh, and there are bathroom problems too.

But, on the bright side, I’m smiling a lot more.  Oh, and I ran 1.5 miles today for the first time in forever.  Felt good to make the distance.  Now I just need to keep at it.

My mind is racing 100mph right now.  I can’t keep on a single track.  Maybe I’ll drop a few sleeping pills and nap till the antihistamine wears off…

I had a meeting yesterday with my shrink.  He thinks I’m depressed.  He’s probably right.  But, if I’m depressed, then what’s “normal”?  And, if I can become “normal”, then how will I change?

Will I still be mad all the time?  Will I still enjoy listening to depressing and angry music?  Will I still like to spend hours tweaking my computers and helis?

How much of who you are is affected by your mental abnormality?

Christ!  I’m turning into a fucking emo…